In Western, industrial nations, there is a high level of gender symmetry in intimate partner abuse. Nevertheless, efforts to reduce domestic violence have been stymied by public policies that favour rigid, feminist models based on flawed theories of patriarchy, and that stereotype males as perpetrators and females as victims. The treatment model advanced in this paper, developed by the author and used in his family violence clinic near San Francisco, California, is based on an accumulated body of research evidence on the etiology and characteristics of intimate partner abuse. Partner abuse cannot be fully understood without considering that the family typically involves mutual dynamics, and requires interventions based on a systemic assessment and understanding of each case. In this model, all modalities may be utilised, and treatment proceeds in a three-phase approach to maximise both treatment effectiveness and victim safety.