As of June 2020, predicting the future of oil prices and, by extension, the long-term economic impact of the pandemic is, at this point, mostly idle speculation. However, predicting the future perceptions of global oil markets would be a viable attempt. Over time, the high-stakes geopolitics of oil has generated an abundance of conspiracy theories regarding the main oil market actors, which are fueled by a combination of strategic misrepresentation and straightforward incompetence on the part of officials and analysts working in energy markets. While providing an overview of misperceptions from past to present, this article exhibits and, responds to, myths about the global oil market that have especially surfaced with the COVID-19 pandemic.