BDSM, Non-Monogamy, Consent, and Stigma Navigation: Narrative Experiences

With the rise in popularity of media pieces depicting alternative sexual/relationship preferences, there has been a rise in interest in kink and BDSM (Sprott & Berkey, 2015), which corresponds with research suggesting that approximately 20% of Americans have been in a consensually non-monogamous relationship (Haupert et al., 2016). Despite this growing popularity, these populations are often stigmatized and misunderstood (Bettinger, 2002). The present study examined the self-reported experiences of individuals who have participated in kink, BDSM, non-monogamy, and/or polyamory. Specifically, the study used qualitative methodology to examine narratives of discrimination, harassment, coming out, being outed, consent violations, and/or sexual assault in a BDSM or non-monogamous encounter. Participants consisted of 67 adults who completed an online survey conducted by the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom and were asked to provide narratives of their experience. Data were analyzed using a modified consensual qualitative research methodology (CQR-M; Spangler et al., 2012). Results indicated 11 categories falling into three domains: navigating incidents (consent issues, negotiation of scenes or relationships, identity/beliefs about coming out, and reporting), contributing factors (role of social media/media, exacerbating factors, and beliefs about the community), and response/prevention (outcome of incident, emotions felt, lessons learned from incident by the participant, and what would be helpful from the community). This study contributes to our understanding of the experiences in this community and elucidates strategies that can be used to intervene and advocate for these populations, including education of the general public and deliberate community support.