How to Write a Contemporary Scientific Article?

Today, scientists are drowned in information and have no time to read all publications, even in a specific area. Information is sifted and only a small fraction of articles is read. Under these circumstances, scientific articles have to be properly adjusted to pass through the superficial sifting. Here, I present instructions for PhD students with almost serious advice on how to write (and how not to write) a contemporary scientific article. I argue that it should "tell a story" and should answer on the three main questions: Why, What, and So what?